


Fire and the Flood

by GG_1798



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Clexa, F/F, Royalty AU
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-02-20
Updated: 2016-02-29
Packaged: 2018-05-22 06:27:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 11,781
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6068695
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GG_1798/pseuds/GG_1798
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Re-uploaded!</p><p>In the city of Arkadia, Princess Clarke Griffin wakes on her seventeenth birthday to the excitement of a birthday ball, held that night in her honor. In Polis, Heda Lexa paces in her room after a sleepless night. It had been a month since her parents had died and she was given power. She clutches a letter in one hand, Queen Griffin's proposal: a political marriage. A joining of neighboring kingdoms. A promise of power and safety.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone, thank you for the lovely comments you sent and for all the support, I hope this can help with your questions. It was brought to my attention that a certain aspect of my story could be read as abusive, and seeing as that was the last thing I wanted, I took it down. However, a bunch of people left comments about it so, I figured I could rework it and put it back up. So, nothing has changed except for chapter 5 (which is in the process of being edited) and once that is finished, I'll continue from there. So sorry!!!

"Heda?" The smooth, deep sound of her advisor's voice broke Lexa out of her trance, "We ride for Arkadia at midday, should you decide you still wish to attend the ball." 

"It would be wise, Indra." Lexa replied, knowing how Indra disapproved of the journey and the proposed union. "My father wanted us to join Arkadia and the twelve clans. Besides, if I am to marry her," The words sounded strange coming from her mouth, saying them made them real. "I should know what she looks like, shouldn't I?"

"You should sleep, Heda." Indra nodded in response, an almost motherly tone seeping into her voice, "I will wake you when we are ready." 

Lexa waved her hand in a gesture of acknowledgement and dismissal, and once Indra closed the door to her room, she fell back onto the soft furs on her bed, willing herself to sleep. 

Guests had already started to arrive at the palace by early evening, and Clarke watched in excitement and impatience through her window as her maids helped her dress. The gown she had chosen was made of a blue silk, the same color as her eyes. It swept against the floor, the bodice and hem of the skirt beaded with small pearls as the center of gold stitched flowers. She had decided on her gold and diamond diadem, placed atop a cascade of silky waves, her hair fell to her mid back. 

The evening began to wear on, the sun setting and the last of her guests arriving. A knock at her door signaled that in the ballroom they were ready for her entrance. Clarke was never fond of the spotlight, however tonight felt different. There was a certain buzz in the air as she walked towards the ballroom, a humming in her chest. 

Lexa had been waiting for her entrance, and was standing near the king and queen, Indra by her side. However, as much time as she had spent imagining the moment, she wasn't prepared for the woman who entered in front of her. She was radiant. As everyone else did, she raised her glass of wine, in a toast, as Clarke made her way towards the head of the table, to her mother's right. Next to where Lexa stood. If she was being honest, she didn't hear the introduction of the princess, nor did she hear the official toast made by the King of Arkadia. Her entire focus was on the blonde heading towards her, and for a moment, Lexa felt ashamed. As bad as the rest of the men and women in the room gawking at the beautiful girl and how her dress hugged her body in just the right way. Swallowing back the guilt and discomfort, Lexa took her seat with the rest of the guests. She wondered if the Princess knew, surely they must have warned her. The first course was served and her internal question still lingered.

"Clarke, have you met Heda Lexa, commander of the Twelve Clans?" Her mother asked, gesturing towards Lexa. 

"I have not," Clarke replied, a polite smile on her lips, "However, I have heard much of your strength, Heda. It is a pleasure to meet you, I thank you for joining us tonight."

Lexa nodded in greeting, the corner of her mouth tugged up into a small half smile. "The pleasure is mine, Princess." She was still in mourning, no one expected a genuine smile out of her tonight. She had already heard the whispers. Lexa knew what they thought of her. Cold. Heartless. "I cannot imagine being anywhere else tonight. Happy birthday." 

In between bites of food, Clarke shot quick glances at the woman to her right. Of course she knew of the tragedy that had taken Lexa's parents. Poison. Yet, Clarke hadn't expected to see such detachment in the commander's eyes. Her emotional strength, or what some referred to as apathy, was becoming quite known across many kingdoms. The girl who took the throne the day after her parent's deaths, attended their funeral, and then sought her revenge on the perpetrators. Lexa had managed the entire thing with a cool head, Clarke wondered if she was as composed as she seemed, as she sat stoically in her black dress and red cloak, clasped around her shoulders with a gold fastening. Clarke also knew of Lexa's physical strength. In Polis, all of the leaders were respected warriors. Lexa had been training with a sword since she could walk, and her feats in battle were occasionally described in songs or poems that would make their way into the Arkadia court. 

The meal continued and Clarke chanced another glance towards Lexa as they brought the dessert out. She found the commander's green eyes were already on her, and she felt her cheeks heat up. 

Lexa smiled in response to the blush, a knowing glint in her eyes as she picked up her fork. She knew the fruit tart they were given was most likely Clarke's favorite, and pushed away the small thought in her mind that she should have her cooks replicate it for their wedding. 

The king dismissed them into the ballroom, where servants carried trays of wine and dance music lifted through the high ceilings. He raised his glass and the music stopped, eyes turning towards him. "Honored guests," Lexa noticed the queen whisper something into Clarke's ear, and saw the blonde visibly tense up. "This night commemorates not only my beautiful daughter, but the union of two kingdoms." There was a ripple of whispers and gasps, and Lexa understood that this was a power play. Many other rulers were in attendance tonight. "In four days time, the city of Polis will host the the wedding of my daughter, Princess Clarke Griffin of Arkadia, to Heda Lexa, Commander of the Twelve Clans. Together they will unite our two kingdoms."

Applause and a murmured buzz of voices responded to his announcement, but Lexa held her gaze on Clarke. The blonde looked livid, and even under her well trained manners, her cheeks were flushed red and a her brow was drawn close. The king gestured for Lexa and Clarke to take the dance floor, and while Lexa walked closer to Clarke, offering out her hand, she didn't miss the fact that the queen had to pinch her daughter's elbow in order to make her step forward.

The hand that met hers was warm and stiff, as Lexa lead her out to the center of the ballroom and the music started. She pulled Clarke towards her as they started their dance, the blonde looking directly over her shoulder.

"You musn't look so angry, Princess." Lexa whispered, "If the other rulers suspect this alliance to be weak, both of our kingdoms are in danger."

"You knew?" Her voice was louder than it should be, and Clarke dug her nails into Lexa's shoulder. 

Lexa stiffened at the pinch on her shoulder, her posture becoming more rigid as other couples began to take the dance floor. "Yes," She muttered, her voice turning cold. "Do not be mistaken, Princess. I am as much forced into this as you are."

"No one rules over you," Clarke spat, thankful that they were only waltzing and that the dance didn't require much effort. "You want this don't you?" 

"My father's dying wish is not one I can simply ignore." Lexa replied, "You are riding back to Polis with me tonight. I suggest you dance for a while more, the ride is easier if you are tired." And with that she stepped away from Clarke, nodding her head in thanks. She turned away and weaved her way out of the crowd. Lexa needed a drink. 

* * *

 Clarke danced with as many other people as she could, avoiding her parents and avoiding Lexa, though the latter did not prove to be too difficult, seeing as the Commander was no where in sight. However, when her father stepped in to be her last dance of the night, Clarke felt tears well in her eyes. 

"How could you?" She whispered, the anger having dissipated into confusion. Clarke knew it was unrealistic now, but she had always dreamed of marrying someone she loved. Now she understood, she was a pawn in the political game. 

"Clarke, Lexa has a strong kingdom. This alliance is one that will help protect us." He spoke softly, "I know you are upset-"

"Upset? Father, you didn't even tell me." Though she wanted to sound angry and fierce, her voice was breaking and Clarke wasn't sure the night could get any worse. It took her a moment to realize they had stopped dancing. 

"We knew you would not agree." He said, brushing back a strand of hair from Clarke's face. "You are young, Clarke. Lexa is able to understand the situation, she has a very sharp mind for this. She will be good for you." 

"Polis is barbaric, father, you've said it yourself. How can you expect me to live there?"

Before he could answer, someone cleared their throat behind Clarke and she turned around to see the jade eyes of the Commander fixed cooly on her. 

"Princess, your servants have brought down much of your clothing. We are leaving soon, if you would like to change."

Lexa did not stay and wait for a response. She turned on her heel, the red velvet of her cloak swirling at her feet as she headed out towards the carriage that they had arrived in. Lexa greatly preferred riding, but since Clarke had already deemed them barbaric, the carriage had been a better choice. Though part of her wishes she hadn't. Her pride was bruised, and if Clarke wanted barbaric, Lexa knew she could show her that.

She waited for Clarke in the carriage, absentmindedly stroking the blade of the knife she always kept tucked away in her boot. The door opened, letting in the cool night air. Once it was closed again, Lexa let herself look at the girl across from her. Clarke was dressed in dark layers, and Lexa was glad she had enough sense to dress warmly. 

"If you feel ill or need to stop, let me know. Otherwise we should be in Polis by sunrise." Lexa didn't look at her as she spoke, instead choosing to gaze straight above Clarke's head. After a moment, she spoke again. "I thought you knew, Clarke."

"Don't call me that."

"As you wish, Princess." Lexa nodded and closed her eyes. 

Clarke took this moment to look at the young woman in front of her. Her eyes traced over Lexa's face, over her regal cheekbones and strong jaw, down her neck. Lexa had unfastened the cloak she wore, revealing her collar bone and arms. Clarke noted the markings on her arms, they did not look painted on, but rather pigmented into her skin. She spent the ride thinking instead of sleeping, and she didn't suspect that Lexa was sleeping either, but rather keeping her eyes closed so she didn't have to look at her future partner. 

"Did you ever play pretend when you were a child, Princess?" Lexa asked, her eyes still closed. 

"Yes," Clarke replied, her heart speeding up a bit for a reason she did not know. 

"What we are going to do is play pretend." She said, her voice emotionless. "To everyone else we must appear united. We have to share a room, but we do not need to share a bed. I will not ask you to commit to me, so long as those you do commit yourself to have enough sense not to talk. You and I will be married, our kingdoms united, like all political marriages we need not be affectionate towards each other behind closed doors." 

"And if someone discovers us?" Clarke asked, her mind still playing over the possibility of them sharing a bed, as Lexa had put it. 

"I will take care of them." The brunette responded easily, before asking. "Do you have a lover, Clarke?" Lexa had opened her eyes, now, wanting to judge Clarke's reaction by more than just her voice. 

"I did." Clarke nodded, "He married someone else, I suppose it was a similar situation." She paused for a moment, meeting Lexa's gaze. "Do you?"

"She is dead." Lexa said, "The queen of Azgeda, one of the clans, beheaded her. Sent me her head." 

"Azgeda?" Clarke's brows furrowed.

"Ice Nation." Lexa translated and the blonde nodded in understanding. 

"I am sorry." Clarke leaned forward and placed a hand on Lexa's arm carefully. 

The Commander looked at her hand, before looking once more at Clarke. "The dead are gone, Clarke. The living are hungry." 

For the first time that night, Clarke became aware of why Lexa was thought of as heartless. She pulled back her hand and Lexa closed her eyes. Clarke took this as her permission to attempt sleep, and let herself drift off


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The wedding

Lexa had appointed Indra to watch over Clarke while she was in Polis. Clarke had her own room in the tall castle Lexa ruled from, and she hadn't seen the Commander much at all. Indra was not impolite, but Clarke could tell she disapproved, and the blonde found herself not only missing home, but even possibly missing Lexa. At least with Lexa she didn't feel so uncomfortable. After a while though, her and Indra settled into a routine, and the two went about their days for the most part, without speaking. The morning of her wedding however, she was not woken by Indra, but rather a group of five servants. Only one spoke English, and her name was Luna, though Clarke had begun to pick up some of their language as well. 

"Princess Clarke," Luna smiled softly, two girls behind her carrying food and tea, the other two carrying fabric and jewelry. "I hope you slept well, we have much to do today." 

* * *

 Once again, Lexa found herself standing, waiting for Clarke to enter the room. However, this time it was her own throne room, and she stood in a black dress, adorned with gold jewelry, her hair intricately braided and her eyes painted with kohl. The sun was setting over Polis and her throne room was basked in a rose gold light. Even Arkadians had to admit, it was a sight to behold. 

Clarke entered, this time her face much more serious than days earlier. Her hair was braided as well, and her eyes also adorned with kohl and a golden color that matched her dress. It seemed in the few days she spent avoiding Clarke, Lexa had forgotten how stunning she was. When she held her hand out for Clarke to take, she was surprised to find that Clarke's gaze was set on her as well. The two turned to face the front, their backs to the crowd, and kneeled. 

A golden cloth was wrapped around their joined hands, and a woman with a haunting voice sang something that sounded like a prayer. Clarke hoped Lexa didn't notice the chills that covered her arms as the woman sang, and while Clarke didn't know what she was saying, the emotion behind the singer's voice was enough to make her forget that this was arranged.  

Once finished, they stood, turning to face their people, and Clarke felt a pain in her chest not only at the bond now formed between her and Lexa, but when she looked at her mother, who had tears in her eyes. The crowd bowed to them, as they walked down the isle together, eyes forward. Clarke had learned that it was tradition for the guests to feast, but not the couple. They headed straight to the Heda's room, and Clarke could feel her pulse racing as they neared Lexa's door. 

Large windows ushered the dying light into the room, mostly furnished with dark wood and a large bed covered in furs. Clarke walked over to look out the window, to look over Polis. What was now hers.  

"Lexa?" Clarke whispered. 

"We do not have to, Clarke." Lexa replied as if she already knew the question. "I know Luna explained the ceremony to you, but as I said. We are simply playing pretend."

"No, that wasn't... Can you tell me what was sung at the ceremony?" She asked, and turned her head to watch as Lexa started to take off the gold bracelets on her arms, and the heavy necklace clasped around her neck. 

She turned towards Clarke, watching as the blonde struggled to take some of her own jewelry off. Lexa realized there were pearls sewn into Clarke's hair as well, and she stepped behind the blonde, placing her hands on her shoulders, signaling her to stop. 

"And will you take a life with me?" Lexa whispered, her fingers unbraiding the small pieces of Clarke's hair. "A body's hollow, a body bleeds." 

Clarke stared straight ahead as Lexa's warm fingers ran through her hair, and her breath tickled against her neck. "We live as one, we live alone," She moved Clarke's hair to the side, brushing against her neck as she unclasped the necklace Clarke had on. "I am your soldier. I will atone." 

"And will you take a life with me? A soul moves on, a soul is freed." Lexa placed the pearls and necklace on the table besides what was supposed to be Clarke's side of the bed, before returning to help with the rest. Her hands traveled down Clarke's arms, sliding the bracelets off, "After the storm a lighting flash with all the world reduced to ash."

"Can you help with the ties of the dress?" Clarke whispered, hoping Lexa couldn't feel the blush on her skin. 

"And will you take a life with me? This world will burn, save what you need." Lexa swallowed, preparing herself for the request, placing her fingers at the first tie. "I am fearless." One knot untied. "I aim to fight." Two more. "I aim to die." The dress was falling open to reveal Clarke's back, which Lexa knew she shouldn't want to touch. "You're in my sight." Her hands shaking slightly, she kept going. "And will you take a life with me? Blood must have blood, my body bleeds."

"That's very intimate." Clarke commented and turned around to face Lexa, who could only nod in response. "I'm sorry about what I said, about Polis being barbaric. I am starting to realize my mistake. It is beautiful." 

"As are you." There was a silence between them, and Clarke saw Lexa's gaze drop to her lips before returning to her eyes. "If you wish to change into something else, your wardrobe has been brought here." Lexa motioned towards the right of the room where there was a little alcove. "I'll be in my study, if you need me." 

Clarke undressed slowly, a strange heat still clinging to her body. She was torn as she pulled on one of her night dresses. The sun had gone down and Lexa had lit candles on her way out of the main part of the bedroom. Luna had told her that what happened after the ceremony is what connected their souls, not the ceremony itself. But Lexa did not want that, and Clarke didn't either. But her time alone had shifted the anger, less of it at Lexa and more towards her parents. 

She found a bowl of water and a cloth set out in front of a mirror, and wiped away her makeup before going to find Lexa again. Clarke walked slowly towards the study, and saw Lexa sitting at a desk, with a scroll in front of her. Her dress was hanging off the back of her chair and she had a thin piece of cloth wrapped around her chest. She wore a loose pair of pants that tapered around her ankles and Clarke looked down nervously.  

"Lexa," Clarke spoke softly, not wanting to startle her, "I know we're supposed to be...otherwise involved, but you wouldn't happen to know if we have any food here do we?"

The brunette looked up and smiled a bit, "Of course, food from the feast has been brought up and placed outside our door so not to disturb us. Would you like me to get them?" Clarke nodded, and Lexa stood up, "Here, sit."

Lexa returned with trays of food, and she removed their coverings when she set them down. As she pulled a chair up to the other side of the desk, she gave Clarke a little smile. 

"Weren't your parents poisoned?" Clarke asked, her eyes trailing skeptically over the food for a moment. 

"Yes," Lexa looked amused. "The guard outside my door, Gustus, had the pleasure of tasting all of the food after he made a comment about the lack of noise. We don't have any wine tonight, I'm afraid." 

"Was it the wine?" Clarke asked, suddenly not sure if she wanted to eat. 

"The cups," Lexa replied easily, taking a bite of some bread to ease Clarke's mood. "They had a residue around the rim. Gustus has gone down to the kitchens." Clarke still looked hesitant. "What do you want?" Lexa asked, gesturing towards the food.  

"The fruit right there, what is it?" 

"Mango," Lexa answered, picking up a slice of the fruit and taking a bite. She waited a moment before offering the piece out to Clarke. "Try it."

Clarke's breath caught in her throat at the invitation. She knew she shouldn't be squeamish, however the action of Lexa feeding her something she had just taken a bite out of seemed more intimate than it should be. After reassuring herself that Lexa was only doing this to show her that the food was safe, she leaned forward and took a bite. 

"Do you like it?" Lexa asked, her green eyes not leaving Clarke for a moment. 

The blonde just nodded in response, and Lexa guided the rest of it into Clarke's mouth, a bit of juice running down the side of her lip. Without thinking, Lexa wiped the juice away with her thumb and licked it off. A deep blush rose on Clarke's lips and Lexa cleared her throat, breaking the tension between them. 

"Anyways, the food is safe." She muttered, looking anywhere but at Clarke. 

Once Clarke had started to eat, Lexa stood up and walked out of sight. When she returned her make up was gone and her face was damp. Clarke wasn't sure how she still managed to look so regal and put together, and quickly averted her eyes when she felt Lexa's gaze fall on her. 

"Aren't you going to eat?" Clarke asked, biting into a piece of perfectly seasoned meat. 

"I'm not hungry." Lexa shrugged. She had now taken to cleaning her knife, instead of looking at Clarke. It was pretty obvious she was lying.

"So, do your guests usually make a lot of noise?" Clarke asked, knowing that the question was quite personal, but they were married now, so she figured she had the right to know. 

Lexa bit her lip instead of responding and set her knife down. "What do you think, Clarke?" The way she asked it held a note of smugness and when Clarke's only response was a blush, Lexa smiled. An actual smile, not one put on for the sake of others. "That's a good color on you," She teased. Lexa picked up a fork and began to eat, making sure to look pointedly at Clarke. "Happy?"

"Yes...I mean it doesn't matter. Do whatever you want." Clarke fumbled, angry with herself for being flustered and angry with Lexa for doing this to her. She stood up and excused herself to go look out at Polis again, now alight in the darkness. When she turned around Lexa was a few feet behind her. 

"I'm sorry, I did not mean to upset you." She said quietly. "I have some books if you like to read. If not, feel free to sleep. The bed is yours, and the servants should be in in the morning to wake you and bring you food." 

"Where are you sleeping?" Clarke asked, walking over to the bed and sitting on the edge of it. 

"I don't sleep a lot," Lexa shrugged, "My desk probably." 

"Our people need a leader who is well rested." Clarke's brow furrowed, "You can sleep in the bed too, it's large enough for both of us." It was true, the bed was certainly large enough for them to sleep without ever touching each other. Clarke wondered if Lexa ever felt lonely in it, and then she wondered if Lexa ever slept in it alone. 

"That's very kind of you, Clarke. Thank you." Lexa nodded and left Clarke in the bedroom, walking back to her study. 

* * *

Clarke let herself drift in and out of a light sleep, almost forgetting that Lexa was even in the room. However, the next time she opened her eyes and hazily took in her surroundings, Lexa was laying next to her. She was laying on her back, as far away from Clarke as she could get, practically on the edge of the bed and Clarke accidentally let a soft laugh slip out. 

"Did I wake you?" Lexa asked softly, turning on her side to look at Clarke. 

"No," Clarke replied, "You're just so far away. I thought you might fall off the bed."

"I'm giving you space." She reasoned, though now realizing how silly it was. 

"It's your bed," Clarke yawned, and Lexa moved a bit closer, still leaving ample space between them. 

"Our bed." She corrected and Clarke pretended she hadn't heard. 


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke gets jealous
> 
> Also things get a lil spicy as we slip into the more M rated stuff

Lexa woke up early, before the sun had finished rising, to a warm weight on her. She opened her eyes and was about to reach for her knife, but then she remembered it was probably just Clarke. And it was. The blonde had thrown a leg over Lexa's hips and she was unfortunately trapped. It would not have been so bad, if Lexa hadn't noticed the nakedness of Clarke's lower half. Her nightgown had rode up throughout the night and Lexa almost stopped breathing when she realized that Clarke had chosen not to wear anything under the silky dress. The thought alone made her mouth dry, but the fact that Clarke was wet and she could feel it on her hip caused something between a whimper and a groan to leave Lexa's lips. 

She was at a loss. If she woke up Clarke, it would be uncomfortable, if she moved Clarke, she would wake up and it would be uncomfortable, and if she stayed like this, Lexa feared she might actually die of shame. Gingerly she placed her hand on Clarke's knee and tried to push it off her, slowly. Unfortunately, trying to move a sleeping body without waking the person was harder than Lexa had planned on it being. A muffled noise from Clarke made Lexa freeze, immediately removing her hand from the blonde's knee, and she cursed herself for not taking the floor. 

"Clarke?" She whispered, unsure if she wanted to wake her up or if she wanted to make sure if she was still asleep. "Clarke." This time she was a bit louder. 

"Hm?"

"I uh...need to get up." Lexa managed, a string on expletives running through her head. 

"So get up." Clarke mumbled sleepily, and Lexa sighed. 

"I um, I can't." For once in her life, Lexa found herself unhappy to be in a situation like this with a beautiful girl. And maybe if Clarke had wanted it, she'd feel differently but this just felt inappropriate. "You're on top of me."

It took a moment for Lexa's words to register with Clarke, but once they did her eyes shot open and she quickly withdrew herself from Lexa. The brunette stood up quickly and Clarke's eyes focused on her as she turned towards Clarke.

"Thanks." Lexa nodded curtly.

Clarke's gaze shifted to a dark patch of fabric on Lexa's pants, right by her hip. Right where... _oh, fuck_. The blonde buried her head into the pillows to hide her burning cheeks and was thankful that Lexa simply carried on as though she didn't notice. She listened to Lexa move around their room for a while and at some point she came back to their bed and set something on it. Clarke waited until the door had closed and sound of Lexa's footsteps disappeared before she opened her eyes. Next to her on the bed was a piece of parchment. 

_Good Morning Clarke,_

_Sleep as long as you wish, your parents would like to join you for breakfast in the dining hall though, so after you are finished dressing just let Gustus know and he will take you there. If you need me, I'll be training in the courtyard. Do not hesitate to interrupt me if you need anything. Tonight I thought we might go to my favorite spot in Polis, if you are up for it, of course. I hope you slept well and had enjoyable dreams._

_Yours, Lexa_

Enjoyable dreams? Clarke groaned and fell back on the bed. Lexa had noticed. 

* * *

Breakfast with her parents had certainly been tedious. Clarke had spent most of it in silence, listening as her parents quietly discussed political strategies with Clarke. A way to reduce trade tariffs, a joining of armies, things Clarke listened to but would not press Lexa about. Clarke had also learned that Gustus was her own personal bodyguard. Once her parents had departed for their trip back home, she turned to Gustus and asked if he could bring her to the courtyard to watch Lexa train. 

"Heda does not like to be interrupted." Gustus commented, however he still walked her towards the courtyard. 

"I don't want to interrupt, I want to watch." Clarke replied, her hands smoothing over the dress she wore.

The dress was a soft peachy color, not one she had previously owned, but suspected Lexa had secretly gifted her. It was much more suited for the sun in Polis than her silken ball gowns. A bronze belt was wrapped around her waist and Luna had come in again to braid her hair. As Clarke walked through Polis, people bowed their heads and addressed her as  _Komhead_ _a,_ which she assumed was the word used for the Heda's partner. 

When they had reached the courtyard, a light breeze blew the hair away from Clarke's face and Gustus motioned towards the sunken training ring where Lexa was. He stepped back and let Clarke watch, her elbows resting on the railing. 

She wasn't sure if Lexa was the one doing the training or being trained at first, but as she watched she noticed her correct the stances of her warriors, or show them better movements. It was clear all of the warriors she was training were younger than her, but not by much. Clarke figured most of them to be her age. The clang of swords had stopped and Lexa said something in Trigedasleng. 

"The group lesson is over." Behind her Gustus spoke, "Heda and the young girl are going to practice hand to hand combat now." The pride in his eyes as he watched Lexa made Clarke curious. Perhaps he was a trusted friend, or once a teacher. 

Clarke watched as Lexa squared up with a girl who had jet black hair. Curiously, Clarke leaned closer and watched. Lexa was easily dodging the attacks, a small grin on her face. In a quick pivot she was behind the girl, gripping her tightly against her, one arm barred across her neck and the other twisting her arm back. Lexa paused here, loosened her grip, and Clarke saw the girl stiffen at the closeness of Lexa, now unthreatening. 

Lexa was showing her how to escape, but Clarke wasn't fond of the way her hands would glide over parts of this girl's body, her waist, her collarbone. It was clear it was just standard training, the the glint in Lexa's eyes made Clarke realize there might be history she doesn't know about here. Not to mention, the girl was practically cooing at Lexa's touch. Clarke knew they had made a deal, they were not committed to each other, but Lexa was publicly flirting. A smirk was tugging at her lips as the girl looked up at her for approval.

Clarke walked down the steps into the arena, and Lexa walked towards her, brows furrowed in confusion and worry. 

" _Hodnes_ ," Clarke smiled and reached out to her, pressing a kiss to her cheek. "Who is your friend?"

She could practically see Lexa processing what she said. Clarke had called her  _love_. The one word she had remembered in Trigedasleng that she could say properly. 

"Clarke," Lexa breathed and returned a kiss to Clarke's temple, easily playing along although the confusion was evident in her eyes. "This is one of my warriors and students, Brya." 

" _Komheda_ ," Brya said sheepishly, her cheeks flushing red.

" _Pleni gon nau, Brya._ " Lexa dismissed her and turned back towards Clarke. "What are you doing?"

"Walk with me?" Clarke asked, though the question was not up for debate. Lexa nodded and linked her arm with Clarke's as they made their way out of the arena and towards the gardens. 

"You were being careless." Clarke commented, "Flirting with her so publicly, especially the day after our wedding."

Lexa opened her mouth as though to protest, but then closed it, nodding. "You are right.

"One would think last night was not satisfactory for you," Clarke raised an eyebrow.

"Gustus knows this is not real, if that is who you are concerned about." Lexa whispered, her eyes trained straight ahead. 

"Do you have history with her?" Clarke ignored her, and smiled at a child who ran through the gardens with his dog. 

"Are you jealous, Clarke?" Lexa asked, grinning slightly. 

"No." The blonde shot back quickly, "Simply concerned about our image."

"I do not want her." Lexa spoke more seriously, and it seemed to appease Clarke, though she would not admit it. "How was the rest of your morning?"

"Uneventful," Clarke shrugged and chose to sit down on a bench among the roses. Lexa joined her and picked one, stripping it of it's thorns before handing it to Clarke. "Thank you." She blushed a bit but then reminded herself that they were playing the game right now. "Will you teach me Trigedasleng, Lexa?" 

"Now?" She asked, the sun making her eyes look like the light that filters through tree leaves. 

"Well, not if you are busy, Heda." Clarke responded dryly.

"You do not need to call me that. I much prefer  _hodnes_." Lexa teased, "You certainly know what that means."

Clarke nudged her gently and rolled her eyes, causing a soft laugh to leave Lexa. The noise made Clarke's chest tight, as she realized this was not something her wife did often. 

" _Beja_ means please." Lexa told her, and Clarke nodded. 

" _Beja..._?" She tried the sound out and Lexa nodded. 

" _Yongon_ means child.  _Houmon_ is wife." 

"The sounds are not so different than English." Clarke commented

"They are not, that's why all of my warriors speak both. If you find yourself needing something  _ai gaf_  and then what you need means 'I want..'" Lexa explained, "You will pick it up very easily, I promise. And I will always translate for you."

"Like last night?" Clarke had moved closer to Lexa, and when she turned to look at her, she thought they might kiss. Instead Lexa stroked one of Clarke's braids, her green eyes never leaving Clarke's. 

"Heda!" A breathless messenger interrupted them, "Oh, you are with _Komheda_. Luna couldn't find her."

Lexa sighed and pressed her fingers to the bridge of her nose. " _Branwada._ " Lexa stood and offered her hand to Clarke as they walked out of the garden. "That is how you call someone a fool. Let us go see what Luna needs." 

* * *

As it turned out, Lexa had requested a tailor come and make Clarke some gowns as well as lounge clothes, and Luna was there to oversee it. Lexa did not stay to watch, excusing herself to a council meeting with a kiss to Clarke's cheek and a hand lingering on her back. It was almost frightening how good Lexa was at pretending, and Clarke knew she needed to be careful. She could still hear the chill in Lexa's voice when she had told her she wasn't doing this willingly, either. 

Though she had gone to bed rather early, the sleep hadn't been particularly restful, so Clarke decided to go back to Lexa's room for a nap after she ate and the dresses were finished. She wasn't sure how long she slept, but she woke up slightly disoriented, overheated and with a sweet ache between her legs. Clarke tossed the furs off of herself and reveled in how the cool air kissed her skin, sending shivers up her spine. It felt wrong to do what she was about to do in Lexa's bed, but Clarke had been putting it off long enough, and Lexa had said the night before, it was their bed.

Clarke didn't take her time as she began touching herself, the desire too pent up to draw out. She even let out a few whimpers, her eyes closing her her mind focusing on the exact person she knew it shouldn't. Lexa. She imagined what it would feel like to have Lexa on top of her, kissing her, grinding against her, touching her...

"What the hell are you doing?"

The question caused Clarke to yank the furs over her body, her heart hammering from her previous endeavor and from sheer anxiousness as the commander stared at her, mouth slightly open. "I was..." Clarke started, but Lexa cut her off.   

"I know what you were doing." She silenced Clarke tersely, holding a hand up and then rubbing her eyes with the other one. "The door has a lock, Clarke." Lexa articulated her words, her voice strained with something like desire and frustration, and maybe a little annoyance. 

Still, the sound of Lexa saying her name sent a jolt of heat through her body and Clarke was finding it hard to focus on anything rational. Why hadn't Lexa left yet? The brunette was pacing now, her hands clasped behind her head. 

"I need to change," Lexa spoke, her jaw clenched tightly, the tendons in her neck pulled taught. 

"Okay," Clarke responded, her voice soft and unsure. Was she supposed to get up and leave? She was naked. "Lexa, I don't have any clothes on." She admitted and Lexa groaned softly.

"Of course, it's completely normal for you to touch yourself naked in my bed because thats what married people do. It's nothing to worry about." Lexa was trying her hardest to keep cool but was now twisting the ring on her finger anxiously, her back still towards Clarke. 

"Our bed." Clarke corrected and Lexa practically whipped around. 

"Really, Clarke?" Something dark flashed in her eyes and Lexa shook her head, grabbing her more formal outfit and walked towards her study to change, muttering something under her breath about self control and torture, which made Clarke smile a bit. But then she felt sick with shame again. Before Clarke could try and fix anything, Lexa was back by the bed, this time wearing only her undergarments. "I heard you say my name."

"Oh."

"Well, is this what you want?" Lexa asked, walking over towards Clarke's side of the bed, her tanned muscles flexing with every step. "Do you want me, Clarke? Or has it just been too long since someone last touched you?"

Clarke couldn't speak as she felt her blush spread to her neck and ears, the heat becoming unbearable. 

"Has anyone even touched you before?" Lexa asked, looking down at Clarke, who finally gained the courage to look back at Lexa. 

"Your people believe that our souls are not united yet. Neither are our two people. They cannot be until we are." She responded, standing up so she was almost level with Lexa, the furs sliding off her body. 

"You do not know what you are asking for." Her voice was low, and she had to step back, the closeness of Clarke overwhelming her. Lexa closed her eyes and shook her head. 

 " _Beja_ , Lexa." Clarke stepped forward, closing the gap between their bodies. " _Beja_." Her voice was a whisper, lips just inches from Lexa.

Lexa took Clarke's face in her hands and kissed her, slowly at first. Then she ran her tongue over Clarke's bottom lip and the blonde's mouth opened to hers. One hand slid down Clarke's back, pulling her close, skin against skin, shivering when Clarke's nails raked down her back. She pulled away, needing to breathe, but Clarke clearly wasn't finished, and caught Lexa's lower lip between her teeth. Lexa's grip tightened on her, as her hand moved from Clarke's cheek to tangle at the base her hair, pulling at it slightly. After a moment Lexa pulled away and moved her lips to Clarke's jaw, kissing under her ear. 

"I have to go to a meeting," She spoke, lips against skin. "I won't be back until later tonight. Touch yourself as much as you like in my bed, so long as you are thinking of me." 

And with that, Lexa left Clarke in a haze of desire, pulling on a simple black dress and her armor, before leaving the room. 


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexa avoids Clarke, Clarke goes to the Polis bath house and hears some gossip.

"Heda it is nearly sunrise." Indra commented dryly, leaning back on the couch in her room as Lexa paced.

"Indra you do not understand." Lexa shook her head, "I kissed her. On the mouth."

"Yes, Heda." The older woman sighed, "You have said that already. You need to get to sleep."

"Well I cannot just go back now, she's still _in there_." Lexa turned to face Indra, a pleading look in her eyes. "How do I fix it?"

"Why don't you focus on the more important tasks at hand," Indra prompted, "Or were you too distracted to pay attention during the council meeting?"

Lexa stared at her advisor for a moment, offended. " _Shof op, Indra_. This _is_ important." 

"Lexa," Indra's expression softened, "From what you said, she wanted to kiss you. Relax, go to bed, stop overthinking."

"Can I sleep on your couch?"

"Heda." Indra did not sound amused.

"Right," Lexa cleared her throat and straightened up, "I will take the guest room. Goodnight, Indra."

* * *

 Lexa had practically been a ghost for the rest of the week. She was never there when Clarke fell asleep, nor when she woke up, only leaving small notes about being "incredibly busy" and for that she was "incredibly sorry". Clarke believed her for the first couple of days but when she did see Lexa, occasionally for meals, or passing each other in the corridors, her movements seemed almost mechanic. It was as though she was suddenly unsure of how to act natural around Clarke. 

Luna suggested Clarke take a trip to the bath house, to soak off some of the tension she was feeling, and Clarke obliged. Gustus did not accompany her, but a female guard did, and she stood towards the door, her eyes forward. Clarke almost forgot she was even there. The bath house was full of steaming pools of water and groups of women that Clarke recognized from around the palace were spread around the pools. Clarke chose an empty one, slipping in, her back towards a group of women adjacent to her. 

The water soothed over her skin and smelled of jasmine, and she wondered if Lexa even knew Polis had a place meant solely for relaxation. Of course, as she settled in, she couldn't help but listen to the group's chatter next to her. 

"You know what I heard yesterday?" One asked, her voice dripping with the excitement of salacious gossip. "Heda is having an affair."

The group gasped slightly, and Clarke rolled her eyes.

"Heda would never, Echo." One woman replied, and Clarke found herself agreeing.

"Think about it, Ontari," The original woman prompted, "She rarely spends time in her room with her wife, you always see her about the palace." 

"Heda is busy." Another piped up, though she didn't sound quite convinced. 

"My maid did say she had not heard much noise from their room while passing by... Perhaps Clarke is just quiet?" Ontari commented, "Celeste, you're being rather quiet about this, and you know from experience, is the Commander acting strange?"

At this, Clarke raised an eyebrow, curious. 

"Well," The woman lowered her voice, enough that Clarke had to strain a bit to hear it, "I have not known Lexa to be so...private with her sex life."

"What does that mean?" Echo asked, and Clarke wondered who this woman was if she could call Lexa by her first name, and do so in public.

"When I used to keep her company, she uh..." Celeste paused, as though trying to phrase her words properly, "I could always count on her to keep me in bed the whole day, if she wanted to. My mother used to get so upset, I would miss all of my engagements, but what Heda wants, she gets."

Not wanting to cause a scene, Clarke moved away from the group before getting out of the bath and covering herself with a towel. As she walked back towards the changing rooms, she dug her nails into her palms, angry with the gossip, but also with herself. She should not feel jealous. After all, Lexa and her made a deal. They were simply playing pretend. 

* * *

 That night Clarke stayed up, waiting for Lexa. After what felt like hours, the door to their room quietly opened, and Lexa moved swiftly, but silently, to place a note by Clarke's bedside table. As she went to leave, Clarke grabbed her wrist, eliciting a small sound of surprise from the commander. 

"Clarke, I did not know you were awake." Lexa spoke softly, and reached around to light a candle. The smell of a match striking filled Clarke's nose, and her wife became illuminated by dim candlelight. 

"I went to the bath house today." Clarke let go of her wrist, knowing that Lexa was trapped in the conversation. 

"Ah, did you enjoy yourself?" Lexa asked her, trying her hardest not to imagine Clarke naked. 

"No." 

The answer caught Lexa by surprise and she crossed her arms, "Why not?"

"The ladies around the palace think you're having an affair." Her voice was controlled and casual, but Lexa could tell that it took effort to keep it that way. "Who is Celeste? Certainly not your dead lover."

Lexa exhaled slowly, bringing her hands to her face. "No, she was a friend." 

"A friend who you kept in bed for...what was it, days at a time?" 

"She was a great comfort to me following my parents' death. I have not spoken to her since I got the letter from your mother. She knew that was the extent of our relationship. It was not one of emotions." Lexa explained, finding that the candlelight did not allow her to read Clarke's expression well enough. 

"Well was she good?" Clarke asked, disdain dripping from her voice. Perhaps Lexa did not need to see her to know what she was thinking. "She can call you Lexa in public. Not many seem to be allowed that."

"A month is a decent amount of time, Clarke." Lexa tried to explain, her voice faltering. 

"Well I assume she must have been saying your name a lot, so I can understand why you would let her continue." 

"Stop it, Clarke." Lexa's voice was cold again, like the night they had danced together. "If I was seeing someone, you would know." She had meant to say it in a sincere way, but Lexa realized once the words had left her mouth, they sounded almost cruel. 

"Right, because she would be in this bed instead of me." Clarke laughed, though it was bitter and joyless. "And where will I take my lovers, Lexa? Do I not get a bed as nice as this one to fuck people on?"

"Get out." For the first time, Clarke thought she could hear a bit of rage in Lexa's voice. 

"Ah yes, that will help our image." Clarke rolled her eyes, "The first thing we need right now is me leaving your room late at night." 

"Fine, then I will leave." 

Before she could even protest, Lexa was out of the room, and she hadn't bothered to close the door quietly. Unable to sleep, Clarke got out of bed and lit more candles, but the increased amount of light only led her to notice the note Lexa had left. 

_Clarke,_

_I have been foolish and stressed lately. I hope you can forgive me. The Ice Nation is coming to Polis tomorrow for a attempted 'peace' dinner. Check your wardrobe, I was looking through my mother's belongings. I think those will suit you nicely, make your eyes appear even more beautiful than they already are._

_Yours,  
Lexa_

Swallowing back her guilt, Clarke walked over to the large wooden wardrobe and opened it. On a shelf, she found a ornate box, which she opened carefully. Inside was the most stunning set of jewelry she had seen. A gold tiara set with blue stones, matching earrings, a necklace and bracelet. She ran her fingers over it lightly, imagining what Lexa's mother must have worn them with, and decided the next morning she would ask Luna. Though she was still angry, she understood that this must have been difficult for Lexa.  


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Apparently "Komheda" doesn't translate the same way to the ice nation ;)
> 
> Jealous!Lexa makes a shining appearance
> 
> Also Prince Roan&Clarke bromance
> 
> Also Jealous!Lexa is ruthless as fuck so get excited

"The Ice Queen is vindictive, try not to anger her too much tonight." Lexa told Clarke from across the room, as Luna braided her hair. 

The Commander was already dressed, once again in all black, though this time in pants, as it allowed for easier fighting. She had managed to flawlessly execute a look that was both formal and intimidating, most likely due to the "decorative" armor and knives she had on. Lexa had wanted to put on her war paint, but Indra had advised against it. This was supposed to be a peaceful party. The food would be plentiful, the drinks freely flowing, Lexa was not allowed to stab the Ice Queen in her femoral artery, and everything would be perfectly fine. 

"You seem to manage that well enough yourself." Clarke responded distantly, fixing the tiara on her head as Luna laced up the back of her white silk dress. "Acceptable?" She asked, turning towards Lexa once Luna had finished.

"You look nice." Lexa replied, but she hadn't even moved her gaze up to look at Clarke. She knew the moment she saw her the anger would melt, and Lexa was too prideful for that to happen just yet. 

"You didn't even look." Clarke sighed, stepping into her shoes. 

Lexa snapped her eyes up pointedly and then returned back to fiddling with her knives. "You look nice." She repeated, though she could think of a million other adjectives to use. Adjectives that Clarke didn't deserve to hear yet, in her opinion. Ethereal was one. Under different circumstances she might dismiss Luna and arrive late with Clarke, but tonight was not the time for that. "Shall we head down?" Lexa offered her arm to Clarke and she took it lightly. 

"I heard that Roan is attending." Clarke commented as they made their way to the ballroom.

"You know Roan?" Lexa asked, sounding mildly interested. 

"Yes, we met very briefly as children. I punched him because he pulled my hair." Clarke shrugged, "I've heard he's grown up rather well." She swore she saw a hint of a smile ghost up on Lexa's lips, but then decided she had imagined it.

They entered the room where Lexa's throne had been moved to, with Clarke's to her left and Clarke put on her best smile as they approached the seats. However Lexa did not sit, instead she stood, with Clarke by her side as they waited for Queen Nia and Prince Roan to enter. 

The Ice Queen had enough sense not to bring her entire military, however she did have a few guards who kept close to her. Lexa's smile didn't even seem forced when she welcomed the Queen as though they were old friends, and Clarke silently commended her diplomacy. 

"Queen Nia, tonight we celebrate the ongoing peace between our two people. It is a pleasure to have you in Polis." Lexa lifted a glass to the queen and everyone else in the room followed, as they toasted to her. Then, the music started and servers came out with trays of food as the crowd started to socialize amicably. 

"Princess Clarke," Roan walked over to her, taking her hand and placing a kiss to her knuckles. "It is a pleasure to see you again, after so long."

"Prince Roan, I see the gossip has done you service. You have aged well." Clarke flashed a radiant smile and turned to Lexa. " _Ai hodnes_ , would you mind if I danced with Prince Roan? We have much to catch up on."

"Go ahead," Lexa smiled and kissed her cheek, perhaps a bit too closely to her lips, but she was making a point. 

Nia and Indra were speaking, Lexa contributing when she felt necessary, but mostly her gaze strayed towards Clarke and Roan. Lexa and Roan had never had much of an issue with each other, besides being in a constant game of 'my horse is bigger than yours', they even used to train together, however things changed when the Ice Queen lost her husband and grew power hungry, and they changed even more when she had Costia tortured and killed. 

Clarke was good though, she was not attempting to get back at Lexa for their previous fight. It appeared as though Roan and her were friends, and Lexa's stomach churned when she saw Clarke toss her head back in laughter. In fact, it wasn't Clarke she was concerned about, it was Roan. He was charming to say the least, and although Lexa did not agree, many thought he was quite good looking. Either way, he kept whispering things into Clarke's ear as they danced and she kept laughing and Lexa hated it. 

"It seems your wife and my son are getting along well," Queen Nia commented, "Clarke has always been such a fiery girl, I was more than surprised when I heard she agreed to marry you."

"Ah, as was I," Lexa laughed lightly, ignoring the backhanded compliment. "She's truly a blessing, and our people have been flourishing under the alliance." Lexa looked back out at the dance floor, trying to ignore how low Roan's hand was on Clarke's back. 

"I can imagine, Arkadia is a very strong kingdom." Nia's lip curled up at the side in something of a knowing smile, "I can imagine you would not want to lose her, as well." 

"Excuse me," Lexa stood up and left to get a drink. 

It wasn't that she really needed one, but more so that she did not want to slit Nia's throat in front of so many people for bringing up Costia. While she was getting a glass of wine, she caught Clarke's gaze and gave her a warning glance. Clarke excused herself for a moment and walked over to Lexa. 

"What's wrong?" She asked, pouring herself some wine. 

"Just...be cautious with Roan." Lexa murmured softly, "I do not trust his intentions."

"You're jealous." Clarke accused.

"No." Lexa shook her head, though she didn't sound very convincing, even to herself. "His mother has been making subtle threats. I just would like you to be careful." She stepped close to Clarke, brushing her hand over the blonde's hip. "Do you have the knife I gave you?" Her lips brushed against Clarke's earlobe. 

"It's on the other hip." Clarke guided Lexa's free hand to her other hip, so she could feel the harness. It would have made Lexa's heart race if Clarke hadn't sounded so annoyed with her. "Now will you stop making a scene?"

Lexa pulled away from her reluctantly and watched as Clarke went to join Roan, two drinks in hand. 

"You haven't let her fuck you, have you?" Roan smirked as he took a glass from Clarke, who practically spit out her own wine. 

"I really don't think that's any of your business," She coughed, before continuing "What makes you say that?" Clarke asked, clearing her throat of the wine she almost choked on. 

"She wants you too much. If you had, she wouldn't be looking at us like that." Roan replied, running a hand through his hair. 

"That's just...her face." Clarke disagreed, "Besides she's made it pretty clear she doesn't."

"Has she now?" He asked, an eyebrow raised. "Care to test that theory?"

"You wouldn't dare." Clarke looked at him with wide eyes. 

"Let's go back and sit down so I can prove you wrong,  _Komheda_." He offered Clarke his arm and they walked back to where the thrones and other chairs and couches were lined up against the wall. 

Initially Clarke was worried her bet with Roan would make her appear unfaithful, however all she really had to do was sit next to Lexa and smile or giggle when Roan complimented her, or placed his hand on her shoulder. Once his hand even rested on her knee, but a glare from Lexa had him move it quickly. The night wore on and Lexa was getting more and more frustrated, the Queen to her right, slyly insulting her at every chance she got, and Clarke on her left, swooning over Roan. Finally the Ice Queen and Roan bid them goodbye, Roan and Clarke sharing a knowing glance as they parted. 

"Clarke," Lexa's voice was sharp, "We should say goodnight as well." 

* * *

 So they did, and Clarke followed Lexa's brisk pace back to their room. She held the door open for Clarke and then locked it behind her. 

"Why the fuck was he touching you like that?" Lexa seethed, and Clarke began taking off her mother's jewelry and placing it back in it's box. 

"I thought he was just being friendly." She feigned ignorance, "Why? Did you see something different?"

"The queen made threats to me about losing you, and then every time I look at you I see her son practically on top of you, not to mention, you're dressed like _that_ , giggling like a child with a crush. What did you expect me to think, Clarke?" Lexa bit out, undressing with her back towards Clarke. "From what I could tell, he had his hands all over you and you liked it."

"He was flirting," Clarke allowed, her eyes trailing down Lexa's muscular back. "But not very obviously. Besides, you said we were free to see other people." 

"Not him." Her jaw tensed. "Anyone but him."

"Anyone but him." Clarke repeated, to let Lexa know she understood, though it wasn't like she wanted him in the first place. "Help me undress, _ai hodnes_?" Clarke asked. She then stepped in front of Lexa, mirroring the position they had stood in her first night in this room.

"Are you fond of this dress, Clarke?" Lexa asked, her voice low. 

"Yes, why?" She asked, warmth spreading through her body at the feeling of Lexa's breath on her neck, the heat of her hands through the fabric of her dress.

"I'm afraid I'm not." Lexa said, her sentence followed by the sound of ripping fabric.

"Fuck, Lexa..." Clarke breathed out, feeling the silk slide off her body and pool on the floor.

"I'm sorry. I will buy you a new one." Lexa didn't sound particularly sorry, and she knew it. "Do you want him?" She asked, her hands unbuckling the knife harness on Clarke's hip. 

"No." Clarke arched her back, leaning into her touch. "I never wanted him."

"Who do you want?" Her hands were sliding up Clarke's sides, resting on the dip of her waist. 

"Don't tease me..." Clarke pleaded, turning her head to look at Lexa. 

"Who do you want, Clarke?" Lexa repeated, her right hand running over Clarke's abdomen and down her inner thigh. 

The action made Clarke draw in a shaky breath, and she turned around in Lexa's arms. She went to kiss Lexa, but the brunette pulled back, just out of her reach. 

"I asked you a question." She was using the voice that she used when giving orders and Clarke felt a fresh wave of desire crash over her.

"Please just let me..." Clarke started, but Lexa's head dipped down and her lips brushed over Clarke's collarbone, distracting her. 

"Not until you say it." This time, Lexa nipped at Clarke's pulse point, causing the blonde to wrap her arms around Lexa and pull her closer. 

 "You." Clarke admitted softly. Her skin felt like it was burning, and Lexa was hot against her. "I want you, Lexa." The heat was becoming too much.

"I want you too,  _ai hodnes._ " Lexa murmured, her lips traveling up Clarke's neck. "You have no idea how badly I wanted to disappear with you tonight." 

"Show me," Clarke whispered, her hand tugging at the waistband of Lexa's pants. 

"Ah, nope." Lexa pulled away smirking and pinned Clarke's hands above her head, backing her against the wall. 

"Why not?" Clarke almost whined and Lexa let out a small laugh. 

"Because you weren't a very good wife, tonight." Lexa teased, lips grazing Clarke's jaw. 

" _Beja?_ " Clarke asked, her eyes looking pleadingly at Lexa.

"That won't work again." Lexa pressed herself even closer to Clarke, her thigh in between the blonde's legs. The pressure was just enough for Clarke to let out a small whimper as she rocked her hips forward, searching for more.

A knock on the door interrupted Clarke's protest and Indra's voice, muffled through the wood, spoke. "Heda, a conflict broke out as the Queen and her son reached the Azgeda border. You are needed to negotiate a punishment."

Lexa's body stiffened and she stepped away, discontent clear on her face. "I'll be back as soon as possible." She grabbed her shirt off the floor, pulling it on. 

"Stay..." Clarke's hands gripped the fabric of Lexa's shirt and the Commander smiled, her frustration melting away for a moment. 

"I can't," She let herself be pulled into the blonde again, placing a kiss on her neck. "It won't take long. Get some rest, I'll join you when I'm back."

Clarke nodded, her lips pouting in a way that Lexa secretly thought was adorable (not that anyone else needed to know that), and she left the room, closing the door a bit louder than necessary. 

"Indra," She greeted her advisor. 

"Did I interrupt you?" The smirk on Indra's face was enough to let Lexa know and the younger woman narrowed her eyes. 

" _Shof op, Indra_." Lexa muttered, crossing her arms as they walked briskly down the corridor. 


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fluff because ~feelings~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for any mistakes, it's been a while since I updated and I wanted to get you all something :) I hope you enjoy, the smut will return soon.

Lexa was relieved when the disturbance was simply a few common people throwing stones, and she managed to convince the Azgeda ambassador that such an act was worthy of community service, not death. Her walk back to her room from the throne room seemed to go on forever and she had to remind herself not to run. Gustus raised an eyebrow when she approached him, but bowed his head. 

"Is Clarke still inside?" Lexa asked, catching her breath from the quick pace she had kept. 

"Where else would she be, Heda?" Gustus asked, amusement evident in his voice. 

Lexa rolled her eyes before reaching for the doorknob, but Gustus's hand on her shoulder stopped her. 

"You have feelings for the girl, Lexa." He commented, and Lexa drew away from his touch. 

" _Hodnes laik kwelnes, Gostus_." She shook her head, "Not after Costia. I cannot let myself."

Her voice was firm and Gustus did not argue, though she suspected if not for the hour of night, he might. Lexa continued into her room, smiling slightly at the sight of Clarke asleep in their bed. She approached her quietly and got into the bed next to her, slipping into one of the most comfortable sleeps she had in a while.

* * *

Clarke was used to waking up without Lexa next to her, but that morning the action stung more than she wanted it to. She knew they hadn't actually done anything the night before, but Clarke thought it at least meant she wouldn't have to wake up alone the next morning. Instead of bracing herself for the cool air, she curled her knees into her chest, hoping to ease the unfamiliar ache of what felt like rejection. They might have reached a common ground of sexual desire the night before, but Clarke was beginning to realize that perhaps that would be the extent of their relationship. After all, Lexa had been kind to her, but it wasn't anything special, as far as Clarke knew. 

Eventually, she hauled herself out of bed, brushing her hair and letting it hang loose. Clarke wasn't in the mood to sit and have Luna braid it this morning, despite it being Polis' custom. The dress she pulled on was an earthy green, and Clarke didn't realize until she put it on that it matched Lexa's eyes. At that thought, the door of their room burst open and a small boy of about six, with flaxen hair ran through followed by none other than the commander herself. Giggling, the boy ran behind Clarke, hiding behind the skirt of her dress. 

"Aden." Lexa's voice was stern but there was a soft smile tugging at her lips, "Warriors do not hide. Are you a warrior or not?" Her eyes flickered to Clarke, her gaze holding the promise of an explanation. 

"I am." He proclaimed, stepping out from behind Clarke. 

"Then fight your Heda and prove it to me." Lexa challenged and set herself up for combat. 

Aden mirrored Lexa's stance, and Clarke watched as the older woman easily dodged his attacks at her calves, swinging at him but missing by just a hair. Close enough so he would learn to move but not hitting him. His leg came at the backs of her legs and Lexa let herself fall to her knees, rather dramatically. By now Clarke's confusion had melted away into snickers and she found herself in awe of the scene in front of her. 

Now level with Lexa, Aden's hits were more 'affective' and Lexa clutched her side, feigning injury. She got in a few more close hits before letting out a rather exaggerated cough and looked up at Aden, now lying down on the ground completely. 

"Aden...finish it..." Lexa wheezed, the little boy now kneeling on her abdomen, ready for the 'kill'. "Tell Clarke...I'll miss her."

Aden raised his hands up, holding an invisible sword and went to finish his deed, a conflicted look on his face. Just at the last second, Lexa's hands slipped up his sides and she was tickling him, his little head thrown back in laughter. 

"Alright, Aden. That's enough training." Lexa was standing again, her hand on the back of his head, stroking his hair as she led him out the door. "Go find Titus." She closed the door and looked back at Clarke, her cheeks flushed from playing. "Sorry, he's been sick, we haven't seen each other for a while."

"He's cute." Clarke commented, still smiling. Lexa had walked over to her and sat on the edge of the bed, patting the spot next to her for Clarke to sit too. "How do you know him?"

"He's my nephew." Lexa responded, her fingers playing with pieces of Clarke's hair. "You want me to braid it for you?"

Clarke nodded, the offer taking her aback slightly, to have such a powerful woman braiding her hair. "I didn't know you have siblings."

Lexa moved so she was leaning against the headboard of her bed, pulling Clarke in between her legs as she started to absentmindedly braid her hair. "Anya was unofficially my older sister. She was a great warrior." Lexa paused, her fingers brushing against the nape of Clarke's neck. "One day I would like Aden to be Heda. I train him as often as Titus, my old teacher and his godfather, allows." 

"Is that how all Hedas learn to fight?" Clarke asked, an eyebrow raised. She couldn't believe such a gentle moment had come from such an intimidating woman. 

At that, Lexa laughed. An free, unrestrained laugh, and buried her head into Clarke's hair, letting the gentle scent of lilacs wash over her. Her fingers abandoned the braids and her arms slipped around Clarke's waist. "I have a soft spot for blondes, apparently." 

Lexa's breath was warm on Clarke's neck and she found herself leaning into her wife's touch. "You left me alone this morning." Clarke pointed out, still smiling, but her tone more serious as her blue eyes found Lexa's. 

"It won't happen again,  _ai swega._ "

"Swega?" Clarke asked.

"Promise. I promise." As she spoke she punctuated her words with kisses to Clarke's scalp. "Are you hungry?"

"Not yet." Clarke shook her head, leaning back completely into Lexa and reveling in the warmth and comfort of her. She could practically hear Lexa's heartbeat. "Lexa?"

"Hm?" Lexa's arms were still around Clarke's waist, her palms now sliding up the blonde's side. She suddenly found herself wanting Clarke naked, and blushed at the thought, swallowing back the desire that had threatened to crowd her mind. 

"We never got to dance together last night." Clarke commented, her eyes closing as her head fell back on Lexa's shoulder. 

"Yes, you were too enamored with Prince Roan."

Even with her eyes closed, Clarke could hear the smirk in Lexa's voice. "Yes he is quite charming." Clarke teased and Lexa's muscles seemed to stiffen a bit before relaxing. 

"I suppose." The response came through gritted teeth and Clarke giggled. 

"You're still jealous, aren't you Heda?" 

"He touched my wife more than I did," Lexa paused before mirroring Clarke's previous words from days before. "I'm simply concerned about our image."

"Of course." Clarke rolled her eyes, but felt her breath catch in her chest as Lexa bit the shell of her ear. 

"Do not forget who you are married to, next time."

Her voice was a low growl, and Clarke had to bite her lip to keep from whimpering. As though Lexa knew Clarke was seconds away from breaking and kissing her, she pushed Clarke forward, smiling. "Let's go to breakfast,  _ai hodnes_." 

Clarke whined in response but followed Lexa out of their room and down the hall, blushing because the Commander was still holding her hand. 

 


End file.
